"What the Bible Says about Divorce and Remarriage" (Wayne Grudem)

TITLE: What the Bible Says about Divorce and Remarriage
AUTHOR: Wayne Grudem
PUBLISHER: Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 2021, (112 pages).

One of the most crippling events in any human relationship is divorce. It breaks up the marital union. It tears families apart. It damages children's perception of the future of their own marriages. Worst of all, it dishonours the marriage institution as well as ridiculing the marriage vow: "For better or for worse." Of course, sympathetically speaking, there are legitimate reasons to break the marital bond. Rather than to throw a blanket no, Jesus's approach is to adopt a reserved exception to the norm. For Christians, the issue of divorce can become complicated especially when it comes to understanding what is the right thing to do ethically and theologically. With modern culture becoming more sophisticated, is the Bible's teaching on divorce still relevant for our times? A related matter after divorce involves the topic of remarriage. What are the circumstances where remarriage is allowed or disallowed? Other questions covered include:

• Are there any legitimate grounds for divorce? If so, what are they?
• How about spousal abuse as morally acceptable ground for divorce? 
• Are there other grounds for divorce that are not explicitly stated in the Bible?
• Is remarriage allowed?
• Can a divorced person serve in the capacity of a Church officer?
• What are the reasons for "no remarriage?"

Author and professor Wayne Grudem gives an honest appraisal of the existing questions surrounding marriage and guides us through with many Bible references and principles. He helps us question the legitimacy of so-called statistics of divorce. As our culture becomes trigger-happy as far as divorces and remarriages are concerned, he brings us back to the serious nature of of divorce. The harm is not just financial but deeply spiritual. We learn about the impact of divorces on children. Grudem evaluates the questions as well as showing us the different perspectives from theologians and scholars. He agrees with some but argues against others, but always with a reasonable level of calm with his feet firmly grounded on the Scriptures. 

My Thoughts

Let me offer some thoughts on why we should read this book. First, it is timely. In the light of the pandemic, some news reports have indicated a rise in legal inquiries pertaining to divorces. Many couples are forced to work from home and to see more of each other. While it is generally a good thing to be spending more time physically together, it could also generate stress that normally would not happen pre-covid times. This is disconcerting because divorce is never God's original plan. Before jumping to inquire on divorces, perhaps, it is better to search the scriptures and to learn about God's view with regard to divorces. This is where this book helps clarify basic questions with firm teachings from the Bible. 

Secondly, this book shifts our attention from trying to solve our marriage problems to trying to see the world (and our marriage) from God's perspective. Very often, we try to use worldly wisdom to deal with our problems. In doing so, we are indirectly saying that the Bible is not relevant for our daily lives. That is furthest from the Truth. Grudem's work here shows us the importance of submitting ourselves to the Bible, and to not just give any marriage another chance, but to give God a chance to redeem our marriages. Of course, Grudem also lays out some legitimate reasons to terminate the marriage but those ought to be more of the exception rather than the norm. Jesus' emphasis in Matthew 19 about the hardness of the human heart, followed by the immorality of adultery should wake us up to the seriousness of divorces. 

Finally, it is important to see this book as a deterrent rather than a promotion of reasons to divorce or to remarry. Anything else must be an exception rather than the norm. Divorce should not even be a last resort and where possible, use every means toward reconciliation and restoration. As far as theological justification is concerned, Grudem reminds us continually that God's plan for marriage is for lifelong monogamy. Both the Old Testament and the New Testament support this position. He attempts to interact with different viewpoints to show readers the different ways people understand the issue.

It has been said that criminal lawyers see the best in bad people while divorce lawyers see the worst in good people. If there is anyone who would benefit from divorces, as far as financial benefits are concerned, it would be lawyers. The ones to carry the damage would be the couples getting divorced. While we may have all the theological positions or the right ethics, pastoral care and sensitive counsel will still be needed when relationships break for whatever reasons. Christians should not see the best in the bad nor the worst in the good. They should see Truth from God's perspective and to let our yes be yes and our no be no. I enjoy this book for presenting the issue clearly and biblically.

Wayne Grudem (PhD, University of Cambridge; DD, Westminster Theological Seminary) is Distinguished Research Professor of Theology and Biblical Studies at Phoenix Seminary, having previously taught for twenty years at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. He is a former president of the Evangelical Theological Society, a member of the Translation Oversight Committee for the English Standard Version of the Bible, the general editor of the ESV Study Bible, and the author of over twenty-five books. 

Rating: 4.5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book has been provided courtesy of Crossway Publishers and NetGalley without requiring a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.