"Strength for the Cancer Journey" (Deborah Barr)

TITLE: Strength for the Cancer Journey: 30 Days of Inspiration, Encouragement, and Comfort
AUTHOR: Deborah Barr
PUBLISHER: Chicago, IL: Moody Publishers, 2020, (208 pages).

Cancer is a tough experience to go through. Not only is it difficult for the patient, it also wreaks havoc on family and loved ones. In fact, just to say "hard" would be an understatement. For many, it begins with shock and denial; proceeding with anger and anguish; followed by resignation or depression. Individuals express it in their own ways. In this book, author Deborah Barr writes a 30-days inspiration with inputs drawn from eight different cancer patients. The emotional ups and downs range from sleepless nights to physical pain. The key question posed in this book is this: Would you face cancer on your own strength or God's strength? If you choose the latter, this book is definitely for you. Meant as a 30-days devotional and journal, this book helps us to journey along both spiritually and emotionally along the difficult path of cancer. Each day introduces a particular thought or emotion. Barr parallels each occurrence with a corresponding set of Bible text to help us lament and learn. We lament the state of brokenness while learning to deal with faith matters. Using real life stories to describe the human experience, Barr helps readers to meander through the many range of emotional expressions without dumbing anyone down. Remembering our pain does not necessarily deny the reality of faith. Acknowledging our questions does not mean we answers are immediately available. Each day is an opportunity to build strength through daily meditation and prayer. With intentionality, the book helps us not only to honestly deal with our questions but also to wait for spiritual enlightenment.

"Losing Susan" (Victor Lee Austin)

TITLE: Losing Susan: Brain Disease, the Priest's Wife, and the God Who Gives and Takes Away
AUTHOR: Victor Lee Austin
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press, 2016, (160 pages).

Losing someone is painful. Watching a loved one deteriorate and suffer is beyond words. Yet, Episcopal Priest Victor Lee Austin had done not only that but to write this book journaling his experience while seeing his wife struggle with brain cancer and its after-effects. It is painful. It is truthful. It is also insightful.

Austin invites us to follow his journey from beginning to end. He shares about how he and his wife met at school, and how her Episcopalian background rubbed with his Presbyterian upbringing. They got to know each other through walking to and from Church. They soon got married, Austin at 22.5 years and Susan at 21 years of age. For fifteen years, they had that beautiful marriage until that fateful day when they discovered Susan's tumor. He shares about his family's levels of faith; that despite the regular issues with the faith of children of clergy, his children Michael and Emily did not lose their faith. Susan was a passionate writer. She also loves children. Austin has a way of describing her love for children.

"Just Show Up" (Kara Tippetts)

TITLE: Just Show Up: The Dance of Walking through Suffering Together
AUTHOR: Kara Tippetts
PUBLISHER: Colorado Springs, CO: David C. Cook Publishers, 2015, (192 pages).

This book begins with a somber greeting: "Hi. My name is Kara Tippetts, and I may not be alive when you read this book. I hope so, but I don’t know. That decision is in the hands of the Author of my life—His name is Jesus. I trust Him with every ounce of who I am."

With these words, Tippetts begins this book with hope, that even when she does not know what to do, what to say, or what to answer, just showing up is already a blessing in itself. It is also a step of humility to come as we are to say: "I'm here. I may not have the answers, but I'm here." With "Just Show Up" as her principle of perseverance through the ups and downs, and especially the suffering moments of life, cancer patient Tippetts shows us what perseverance means amid the pains and sorrows of life. Tippetts died on March 22, 2015, but not without touching the lives of many. Through this book, her life continues to influence many even after her death. Written with Jill Lynn Buteyn, author of inspirational novel, Falling for Texas, this book is an honest down to earth retelling of the struggles through the tough times of life by simply walking together and being present for each other.

"After You Hear It's Cancer" (John Leifer)

TITLE: After You Hear It's Cancer: A Guide to Navigating the Difficult Journey Ahead
AUTHOR: John Leifer (with Lori Lindstrom Leifer)
PUBLISHER: Lanham, MD: Bowman and Littlefield, 2015, (320 pages).

The C word strikes fear initially. Once it has sunk in, the emotions are often mixed with both confusion as well as moments of clarity about what life is really about. Calling it a "life changing experience," author John Leifer shares from the heart about his journey with his wife, who was diagnosed with malignant breast cancer. Like what his wife felt about encountering cancer for the first time, the feeling is one of being overwhelmed and shut down. Making decisions about what to do next becomes an even greater challenge with stress and anxiety swirling around. Quoting Karen Sepucha of Harvard Medical School, it is a common scenario that even those who had overcome past challenges will find it difficult to help themselves. That is why people with cancer need support. That is why families of cancer patients need help. That is why books like this is a valuable resource to help deal with the difficult path carved by the news of cancer.

In writing this book, senior health executive and author John Leifer hopes to empower readers toward better decision making when hearing news about cancer. He guides us through the experiences of ten individuals plus his wife Lori, to give us a first person account of the long and difficult journey. He leads us through the BEFORE-DURING-AFTER phases of cancer treatments.

"Rejoicing in Lament" (J. Todd Billings)

TITLE: Rejoicing in Lament: Wrestling with Incurable Cancer and Life in Christ
AUTHOR: J. Todd Billings
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press, 2015, (224 pages).

What happens to your faith when the doctor said you have cancer? Where can one turn to? How can one deal with this personally and within the community? Not easy we may say. The author of this shares with us his own journey through cancer, chemotherapy, and frequent bouts of lament in the Lord. Diagnosed with incurable cancer at the age of 39, scheduled for chemotherapy treatments, and forced to reckon with limited time, scholar and theologian, J. Todd Billings, Professor of Reformed Theology at Western Theological Seminary in Holland Michigan shares a personal reflection of theology applied to life and impending death. When he shared about his cancer, the most encouraging comments he received was by a girl who wrote him a card with the words: "God is bigger than cancer." That sets him in perspective and a journey to praying through the Psalms, reflecting through the lament passages of Scripture, and learning to read passages on suffering as a cancer patient.

In his first six months of chemotherapy, Billings describes his spiritual learning in the first six chapters. He begins with his initial fog experience, not knowing what to expect when he shared about his cancer. He shares about some questions about life do not really have answers, at least during our time on earth. Those who tried will tend to give wrong answers, like the friends in Job. As far as pain, suffering, and the problem of evil goes, there are more questions than answers, more mysteries than solutions, and a greater need for personal comfort rather than an impersonal argument.  He clings to the lament psalms and other passages even as he endures the painful effects of chemotherapy. He realizes the loss that churches suffered when they simply bypassed the lament psalms during regular worship time.

"Dear Deb" (Margaret Terry)

TITLE: Dear Deb: A Woman with Cancer, a Friend with Secrets, and the Letters That Became Their Miracle
AUTHOR: Margaret Terry
PUBLISHER: Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2012, (222 pages).

This book reads like a part-memoir, part-letter, and part-retrospective writing. Addressed to a friend called Deb, who is struggling with Stage 4 terminal lung cancer, the author tries to walk with Deb as a friend, a confidante, a fellow pilgrim, as well as a spiritual counselor. Within a span of six months, Margaret Terry pens 102 letters, of which only 55 are published here. If you were to count the number of envelops on the cover, the number is even less, 52. In this short time, Terry and Deb moves from mere acquaintance to deep friends, joined together by honest sharing of their lives and a common faith in God. What is most inspiring is that while doctors call Deb's cancer "inoperable," and cancer continues to torment not just her lungs but also her brain, Deb is still able to form a close bond with Terry, through letters.

It all begins with Terry joining a prayer group specifically tasked to pray for Deb. Gradually, the focus progresses beyond mere praying for Deb toward caring for Deb. Terry makes herself vulnerable with open sharing about her own life events, and her corresponding emotional attachments. Each letter begins with a retrospective look at one story or incident in Terry's life, progressing with thoughtful reflection and ending with a Bible verse, that sums up God's pronouncement on all that have happened. Terry shares about her encounter with a homeless man, and gradually learns that charitable giving on her part may very well be impeding on the homeless man's "work." She shares how her son, Michael taught her how to view the sky from underwater. He reveals the painful moments of the day when her husband asks for a divorce, and how the Lord is close to the brokenhearted. Terry also writes with flashbacks on her younger years with her mother, her church, her family, her work, and many of her daily encounters with life. By revealing herself more, she hopes to encourage Deb, and in the process, finds in Deb not just a listening ear, but a healing moment. There are questions of faith, how her non-church-going lifestyle was rocked by her sons' strange desire to want to go to church. In doing so, she learns how church has changed through her 25 years of absence. Terry also reflects on how Anne Lamott's thinking of faith and gratitude shapes her own beliefs, that God cares less of what she does, and more of what is in her heart. There is a progression from matters of reflecting events and incidents, toward matters of reflecting deep faith and emotional questions in the heart. Thanks to a captivated audience of one, namely Deb, Terry's letters to Deb become a literary healing center for both of them. Publishing the letters has invited the rest of the world to listen in and be touched. Terry's deepest desire can be summed up in this.

"Freedom. My heart wants the freedom to be a writer without restraints, the freedom to love again without fear, and the freedom to hear God without my insecure self getting in the way. Yup, freedom would feed my heart and give me peace." (Margaret Terry, p204)

Sometimes, I feel that the strongest people emotionally and spiritually are precisely those who are going through deep physical challenges. This book is not simply about one who is strong trying to reach out to another who is weak. It is the sharing of vulnerability on the part of Terry that brings companionship and meaning to a dying cancer patient, Deb. "Dear Deb" reads less of an instructive manual of how to help one cope with cancer, but more of a journey of what it means for two persons to share their lives, regardless of their physical ailments or emotional conditions. This is what friendship is all about. This is how what relationships can become. This is how faith can shape and grow, to make two distant lives become a meaningfully shared journey. This book is a perfect example of how ordinary lives can be made more extraordinary with openness, adequate reflection, sprinkled with humour and lighthearted cheer. Most importantly, it is a testimony that even the most down and out can find hope and faith in God, and people, through God and through one another.

Rating: 5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book is provided to me free by Thomas-Nelson and Graf-Martin Communiations in exchange for an honest review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.