"The In-Between" (Hadley Vlahos R.N.)

TITLE: The In-Between: Unforgettable Encounters During Life's Final Moments
AUTHOR: Hadley Vlahos R.N.
PUBLISHER: New York, NY: Ballantine Books, 2023, (288 pages).
 

Among the many kinds of phobia in the world today, the fear of dying remains at the top of the list. News of terminal illness can not only bring about depression to the sick, but it also stresses our family and loved ones in unimaginable ways. Whether it is cancer or some form of debilitating disease, as long as there is some hope of recovery, the fear of dying can be kept at bay. However, when it comes to incurable illnesses that involve entering into hospice care, the mood takes a traumatic turn. Imagine being a full-time staff working in such an environment. This is exactly what author and registered hospice nurse, Hadley Vlahos has experienced. She takes care of and walks with many people living their final days on Earth. Each patient can live up to six months. Sharing many powerful stories of courage, despair, hope, powerlessness, and many emotional moments, Vlahos takes us through the ups and downs of hospice ministry. She shares how she first became interested in end-of-life matters after the death of a personal friend. Through various twists and turns in her life, after some time in nursing school, she ends up working in hospice care. This book is about her learning, experiences, and journeys with individuals in hospice care. There was Glenda, an 86-year-old female whose metastatic melanoma had spread to other regions. She was the first person the author had to practice the checklist on "patient death." Carl who struggled with congestive heart failure seemed to have a sudden ad mysterious surge of energy toward the end. He had become like a grandfather to Vlahos. Then there is Sue who suffers from chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) and didn't want to speak to anyone at first but eventually opens up to Vlahos. Sandra, a 50-year-old breast cancer patient whose cancer had advanced to such a state that her doctor had to recommend hospice care. Sandra was able to maintain a smile despite her illness. Vlahos marvels at how simple things could make such a big difference. There are others with all other kinds of sicknesses like Edith's Alzheimer's; Reggie's end-stage liver disease; and Lily, a dying travel patient, etc. 

"Seasons of Wonder" (Bonnie Smith Whitehouse)

TITLE: Seasons of Wonder: Making the Ordinary Sacred Through Projects, Prayers, Reflections, and Rituals: A 52-week devotional
AUTHOR: Bonnie Smith Whitehouse
PUBLISHER: New York, NY: Convergent Books, 2022, (368 pages).
 

Spirituality is essentially learning to notice and appreciate the ordinary. Christian Spirituality is to do the same with the perspective of Christ. Author Bonnie Smith Whitehouse has chosen the theme of seasons to help us through all 52 weeks of the year to do just that. She uses the Western Church liturgical seasons, special days, and metaphors to aid our reflections. These are then organized with a solar-liturgical calendar to give us a nice circular diagram of how to enjoy the different seasons of wonder. The purpose of this book is to enable readers to gather our thoughts, our community, and ourselves at any time of the year to reflect upon God. Guided by the Anglican Book of Common Prayer and the Lectionary, she affirms that the "circle of the liturgical year transforms our days into sacred time." Her theme each month is as follows:

1. January - Transcend Dualities
2. February - Discover Contemplation
3. March - Embrace Mystery
4. April - Welcome Incarnation
5. May - Adore Creation
6. June - Come Alive
7. July - Cultivate Resilience
8. August - Cherish the Holy Pause
9. September - Gather Courage
10. October - Light a Fire
11. November - Point to Love
12. December - Look for the Light

"Why You Matter" (Michael Sherrard)

TITLE: Why You Matter (Perspectives: A Summit Ministries Series): How Your Quest for Meaning Is Meaningless without God
AUTHOR: Michael Sherrard
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2021, (194 pages).

For every "what" there needs to be a "why." For some of us, we need more than simply an answer to the latter. For many of us, this is essentially a quest for meaning and significance of our lives. What makes life meaningful? How are we part of the grand plan of significance? The key thesis in this book is that God exists, and that is why we matter. With the ongoing pandemic, many people are dealing with disruptions, loneliness, deaths, sicknesses, health issues, in particular mental and spiritual well-being. These might lead them to question the meaning of life. Then comes racial issues which led to the rise of the "Black Lives Matter" as well as an "All Lives Matter" reaction by some quarters. Even in societies that pride on equality and freedom of expression, many people still go through crises of various types. Author and pastor Michael Sherrard focus on a "crisis of meaning" to probe behind the reasons why people insist their lives matter in the first place. Once we can understand that, the rest will come into place. He helps us go beyond mere feelings as a judge of our worth. For feelings are often too subjective to be reliable. Rather than letting our feelings, our skills, or our subjectivity determine our life's meaning and identity, why not go back to our Creator? How is that meaningful? In the quest for such answers, we start by observing the culture and society we are living in. Can our present situation of secularism and godless society bring everlasting meaning? What are the promises of atheism? What about morality? The author helps us take a critical look at the society we are in, on the emptiness of the "good life" we often assume we are in. Gradually, he switches gear to help us envision a world with God. Sherrard essentially says the following:  

"Launch Your Encore" (Hans Finzel and Rick Hicks)

TITLE: Launch Your Encore: Finding Adventure and Purpose Later in Life
AUTHOR: Hans Finzel and Rick Hicks
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2015, (208 pages).

In America, more than 76 million people are above 60 years of age. Some call it retirement phase. Others call it the golden years or the silver hair period of life. After many years of active working, this phase of life is often marked by slowdowns  physically, mentally, and emotionally. In such later years, what can these people do? They may retire from their jobs but they cannot retire from life altogether. Moreover, with more people living longer and the pace of society getting quicker, it can be very challenging for people in this age group to cope. Rather than to be shoved aside, the authors of this book believe that retirement is more an opportunity rather than an unwelcome phase of life. The premise is this.

"The word retirement should not be an exit sign, but a door into something fresh, new, and exciting." (17)

This "final act" may very well be this particular generation's "greatest contribution." How is it possible, one may ask. The authors frame the process in four parts.

"The Art of Helping Others" (Douglas C. Mann)

TITLE: The Art of Helping Others: How Artists Can Serve God and Love the World
AUTHOR: Douglas C. Mann
PUBLISHER: Downers Grove, IL: IVP, 2014, (144 pages).

Is there a link between art and religion? How can creativity be embedded in worship? Is there such a thing as a "Christian artist?" Is art irrelevant to the ministry of social justice and service? What is the role of "Christian art?" This book explores the above questions and many more from the standpoint of "creative incitement" which refers to a creative way to bring out the self-awareness, the artist and the activist in us. Douglas Mann is a published songwriter, a former music and book business executive who had not only discovered the beauty of art, he has embraced the calling to help others discover their creative calling. In this book, Mann has brought together two key concepts: Creativity and "incitement" which comes from the latin word incitare meaning "to awaken, to bring out of sleep." The process of discovering one's calling begins with awareness.

Awareness means discovering that something that we are willing to lose everything for. It means letting our self-identity shapes the art or works we create. It means knowing ourselves as we let ourselves be known in the artistic creations we embark upon. At the same time, it is also that awareness that calling is not easily dampened by pain and suffering. In fact, it can energize one to do things that surpass one's understanding. At the same time, pride needs to be checked, lest it dumbs down what God is trying to do in us in the first place. It is being aware of our calling to be "creative inciters" that dares to take risks, that not only revolts at the injustice we see but re-ignites a desire to do something about it. It moves away from "what if" thinking toward a "why not" mentality. After all, Jesus was an artist, a storyteller, a master of creative communications. The downside of being a creative artist is to become "fishers of Zen" when hard times befall us, and render us staring down at the gutter of grime and dirt and missing out on gazing at the stars in the sky.

"One Big Thing" (Phil Cooke)

TITLE: One Big Thing: Discovering What You Were Born to Do
AUTHOR: Phil Cooke
PUBLISHER: Nashville, TN: Thomas-Nelson, 2012, (186 pages).

This book begins with two big questions to drive home one big thing. The two questions are:

1. "What am I supposed to do with my life?"
2. "In a hyper-competitive, cluttered, and distracted world, how do I get noticed?"

Both of these questions intersect to drive home one big thing, to discover what exactly are we born to do. It is about focus. It is about being able to recognize what is important and what is not. It is to know oneself, and to be purposeful according to one's knowledge of self. Cooke shows us that without intentional living, we let culture define who we are and what we ought to do. Without a sense of destiny, we will miss the opportunity to make a choice, and instead let ourselves be vulnerable to the whims and fancies of chance occurrences. This is a culture of clutter, of distractions, and very limited attention span. One of the biggest downside of such activism is a sense of meaninglessness. That is why Cooke argues for the need to have a sense of direction, appropriate influence, and a healthy sense of personal identity. Once this is appropriated, one can begin the journey to living the person we really are. We learn to let priorities be driven by values, to learn to take responsibility for the choices we need to make for ourselves, to map out our own future, to see the difference between jobs and our vocations, and to learn to harness the power of modern communications, according to our own make up.

My Thoughts

The way the author writes is captivating. He poses good questions to hook the attention of readers, to enable them to internalize the question into a personal one. He suggests several ideas, in the hope that at least one will hit home. He reads the culture at large and reminds readers that all that glitters out there is not necessarily precious or worthwhile. What is more important is to recognize our true sense of self and worth, and having done that, to learn to live in a manner that blesses others. There are at least three ways to benefit from this book. First, it is a mirror to look and to reflect on our own lives. Far too many people are living according to the values of the world, chasing after material dreams simply because everyone is doing it. As a mirror, it makes us think more seriously about what is more important for us. Second, it is a guide to help us discover who we are and what we are called to be. This sense of being will determine what we can do best. In our world, it is easy to react according to what the world hits us with. We need to learn to sift through the mass of information, to determine what is central and fundamental, and what is peripheral, and having done that, to make a conscious choice for the necessary. Third, it is a book to help us live well, that we can benefit others. Yes, no one is an island. No one needs to live only for self. We need to discover the role we play as a community. For people who feel uncomfortable about self-improvement, lest one becomes too individualistic focused, I like to offer some encouragement. Improving oneself is not wrong. Learn to see self-improvement as a way to bring positive energy and good to the community you are in.

This is one book that makes readers feel good about themselves, and having done that, to make one sit up and do something with their lives. The practical steps are easy to understand. The challenge to step out of our comfort zone is more difficult to practise. If readers are able to overcome their resistance to change, and to live on purpose and overcome the obstacles to change, they will benefit most. This book is strong in calling one to take the first step. It is not so useful when the going gets tough, or when discouragement steps in when the results are not forthcoming. That is why this book may give us the kick start. For Christians, we need the Bible and the Holy Spirit to help us navigate the marathon.

Rating: 4 stars of 5.

conrade

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Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com <http://BookSneeze®.com> book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255<http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/waisidx_03/16cfr255_03.html> : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”