"Better decisions, Fewer Regrets" (Andy Stanley)

TITLE: Better Decisions, Fewer Regrets: 5 Questions to Help You Determine Your Next Move
AUTHOR: Andy Stanley
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Reflective, 2020, (192 pages).

What should I do next? What should I do with my life? What do I really want? Why do I want to know what's my next move? Tell me the answer and I will do it! For Christians, one of the classic questions would be to ask: "What is God's calling for me?" These perhaps are some of the decision making questions that challenge us daily, and for some, the question might even linger on for a lifetime. Indeed, making decisions is one of the most important things we do. So much so that for some, not making a decision is an easy way out. While popular wisdom says that there is no such thing as a dumb question, it is always helpful when we learn how to ask better questions. Some answers would challenge the mental while others might just appease the curious. The most powerful questions are those that help us determine our calling and purpose in life. "What do we do next?" is a question that needs to be asked at regular intervals of our lives. Instead of allowing our emotions and desires rule over our decision making, we need to involved the mental calmness and objectivity in asking hard and honest questions about what we are seeking. Enters the five questions which Andy Stanley hopes will help unlock ourselves toward a meaningful journey of self-discovery and good decision making. The questions deal with one's sense of identity, purpose, and desire for fulfilment. These five questions are:

1. INTEGRITY: Am I being honest with myself?
2. LEGACY: What Story do I want to tell?
3. CONSCIENCE: Is there a tension that deserves my attention?
4. MATURITY: What is the Wise Thing to do?
5. RELATIONSHIP: What does love require of me?

Reflecting on his own experience with his father, author and pastor Andy Stanley recalls how his dad helped him understand the why before the answers. The mantra he learned was this: "Good questions lead to better decisions." Questions are guideposts, directional signs, and essential prompts for us to discover truth. The main thesis of this book is that these five questions help to crystallize our decision making processes and decisions about our future. The question must come before any decision-making. The first question looks at the issue of integrity. Learning to lead oneself is key to honesty. The worst thing to believe in is our own lies of self-deception. Stanley even challenges us to ask this same question TWICE! Otherwise, we might be tempted toward the destructive 3Ds: making Dumb Purchases, forming Doomed relationships, and living Destructive Habits. He also gives us some psychological reasons why we lie to ourselves. He also uses the story of Zedekiah to show us the folly of self-deception.

In the legacy question, he reveals the stories about how his father's decisions affected him and many others. He urges us to think of our lives as stories and then to ask ourselves what kind of stories we want to tell to others about ourselves. He uses the story of Joseph was was able to leave behind a legacy of faithfulness and righteousness in the face of many challenges and tough decision making points in his life. 

On the conscience question, Stanley asks an interesting question that deals with the ethics of our decision making. Using the example of David and Saul, he observes that David could have followed the worldly thing to kill Saul and take the throne. Instead, he was pricked by the conscience not to lay even a finger on God's anointed king. Pause when needed and explore rather than ignore our conscience.

On Maturity, we seek the way of wisdom instead of what is the fastest, the most beneficial, or the most profitable decision. Paul's teaching in Ephesians 5:15-16 illustrates the need for living wisely in an evil age. Finally, the Relationship question brings us back to the topic of love. 

My Thoughts

These questions and thoughts about decision-making have been preached at sermons given at North Point Community Church earlier in January 2021. In line with the vision to make sermons relevant and practical for all, especially the unchurched, the sermons touch on themes that many of us would relate to. The five questions all center around making decisions that are vital to all of our lives. The first question of Integrity is linked to our individual identity: Who am I? The second question of Legacy prompts us to ask ourselves: What kind of a story do we want to tell others and the next generation. the third question is about the ethics of right and wrong, and discerning what is right before God. The fourth question helps us to grow beyond factors of efficiency or efficacy, toward growth in wisdom in Christ. The final question brings us back to the greatest commandment of them all: Loving God and loving our neighbour. 

The author has a gift of communicating basic truths to a large audience, and this book is a way to spread that message beyond his Church. Whether we are Christians or not, the five questions are highly applicable in our regular decision making. While some questions might be more meaningful to us at different times in life, it is important to consider all five questions as a package. All of them help us along in our decision making process. Separately, they enable us to focus on specific matters in different contexts. Together, they help us to piece everything together as we write our stories. Perhaps, readers should not be limited to these five questions only. I believe that these form a good introductory framework for us to work on. There will always room to ask many other questions on how we can make better decisions as we grow. This book will be that spark to trigger the flames of meaningful living. 

Andy Stanley is founder and senior pastor of North Point Community Church. It is associated with North Point Ministries that was founded in 1995 with a vision to create churches that unchurched people would love to attend.

Rating: 4.25 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book has been provided courtesy of Zondervan and NetGalley without requiring a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.