"Aging Faithfully" (Alice Fryling)

TITLE: Aging Faithfully: The Holy Invitation of Growing Older
AUTHOR: Alice Fryling
PUBLISHER: Colorado Springs, CO: Tyndale House Publishers, 2021, (192 pages).
 

Many parts of the developed world are encountering the graying phenomenon. As the average life expectancy increases, there will be greater demands on healthcare, medical insurance, and the social safety net. Countries in North America, Western Europe, Japan, Australia, and many other developed countries constantly grapple with how current welfare infrastructure could be sustained into the future. On top of the social and economic challenges, there are also mental health issues that need to be addressed. Already, Covid-19 has wrecked many families who have lost loved ones in the vulnerable elderly age bracket. The central question in this book is this: How do we age faithfully? Author Alice Fryling starts off with some observations on how society view aging in general. The topic of aging tends to be discussed theoretically when we are in our 50s. When in our 60s, we begin to feel the symptoms of aging. In our 70s, we are forced to finally acknowledge that our bodies can no longer catch up with our mental wills. Beyond 80s, we would be facing increasingly significant physical and mental challenges, assuming we didn't get sick in the first place. Fryling affirms that even when we age, we can live with a purpose: "To understand the uniqueness, the complexities, the needs, and the potential" of our souls as we journey toward old age. 

We can do this with a paradigm shift to see retirement differently from the rest of the world. That retirement should be seen as an exciting new phase of life. something Fryling calls "liminal space." Interestingly, the author uses the biblical images of fruitfulness and new wineskins to help us crystallize this space. Apart from watching trees in the garden, we can train ourselves to see aging as entering a new kind of birth. This means learning new ways to live and seeing the world through a new lens. A key distinction is to move away from "false self" thinking toward "true self," with the Bible as a valuable guide. Then there is the fact of seeing more of our contemporaries leaving this world. Facing losses can be particularly difficult. The closer the relationship, the tougher the goodbyes. Such a season of life requires a change of thinking as well. After pointing out how some conventional thinking retards the aging process, we get practical strategies on how to transform our thinking. One of them is the spiritual aspect of change. Apart from acceptance and the task of counting one's losses, we can learn how to listen to our bodies and our souls. Using the Lectio Divina, we learn about pacing ourselves with the Word of God. We don't have to let our bodies tell us what we are feeling, but to let the Word of God draw out our souls' responses to God's prompting. This calls for one to soak in the richness of the Bible. Then and only then can we move from holy losses to holy invitations. This is the crux of a spiritual transformation that could move us from physical age-ing to spiritual sage-ing. When practiced earlier in our lives, such a strategy could prepare us to let go of the things of this world and to embrace the next. 

My Thoughts

There are many reasons why this book is valuable for all ages. First, the golden agers (or silver sages), those who are retired or above 60s, they can deal with the fears and apprehensions of growing old. The author who is in this age group writes with full understanding and empathy on the plight of what it means to be old. The title of the book should be enticing enough for anyone currently in this phase of life. In fact, the title is a positive rendering about the way that the aged ought to be doing. Be faithful even when our bodies are losing their edge. There is a lot of great resources here such as biblical assurances, testimonies, and tips about bridging generations. Second, for the middle-agers, this book forms a useful reminder that time is short and that it is never too early to plan for retirement. Many who are in this age group are usually busy with work, responsibilities, and great plans for the future. Many of these plans center around material subsistence or monetary gains. For example, one of the measures of preparing for the future is Financial Planning or some form of investment. All of these planning centers around financial projections or asset growth. Not many look at the emotional or spiritual aspect of aging. Knowing how to age faithfully applies equally to this group especially when life is so fragile. No one can predict if one can even live to 60! Finally, for those 40 years and younger, this book could serve many purposes. One key purpose is greater empathy for the aged. For this group, they might have parents who are entering the aged phase and with no experience or know-how about aging, they might not know how to empathize. Hopefully, this book could do more than mere information but result in the transformation of their thinking about aging. What better way than to learn at an early stage. 

Aging is a practical matter for all ages to think about. One does not need to wait until they are old before preparing for old-aged issues. As we celebrate birthdays every year, after blowing out candles and enjoying the parties, we can have the rest of the year to ponder about how we want to age faithfully. This book provides a way for us to do that and should be a valuable resource for each year and many years to come.

Alice Fryling is a spiritual director and a bestselling author of ten books on relationships and spiritual formation, including her new book Aging Faithfully: The Holy Invitation of Growing Older, to be released November 9, 2021. Alice received training in Spiritual Direction from the Christos Center in Minneapolis, and training in the Enneagram at Loyola University. She has been leading Enneagram workshops for thirty years, teaching participants how to use the Enneagram to know God and themselves more deeply. She is also certified to teach the Myers Briggs Temperament Inventory. She and her husband, Bob, have two married daughters and four grandchildren. They live in Monument, Colorado.

Rating: 4.5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book has been provided courtesy of Tyndale House Publishers, NavPress, and NetGalley without requiring a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.