"I've Seen the End of You" (W. Lee Warren)

TITLE: I've Seen the End of You: A Neurosurgeon's Look at Faith, Doubt, and the Things We Think We Know
AUTHOR: W. Lee Warren
PUBLISHER: Colorado Springs, CO: Waterbrook, 2020, (272 pages).

What do you do with a tumour that has a 100% fatality rate? How do we cope with situations where there is no more hope for survival? Hope is one of the most cherished and necessary virtues for life. With hope, we can still grind through life. Without hope, it is a completely different story. He writes his experiences with patients, family, and loved ones with regard to life, faith, doubt, pain, gratitude, and hope. In a book that reads like a personal memoir, author and neurosurgeon, Dr Lee Warren shows us what he had learned from the experiences of people nearing death and losing hopes for survival. Many things he thought he knew, only to be humbled to realize that there are still many things he did not know. He shares these experiences in this personal revelation of faith, doubt, despair, and hope. The key question throughout the book is the very question the author wrote to Philip Yancey: "How can I pray for my patients when I already know how God is going to answer?" This is with regard to the type of brain cancer called "Glioblastoma Multiforme" (GBM), where from his medical experience has 100% fatality rate. For Warren, it is also a question of faith. "What happens when our messy lives mess with what we think we believe?"


Written in three parts, Part One details his journey through diagnosing the disease, understanding the impact, dealing with symptoms, and questions pertaining to end-of-life caregiving scenarios. He asks questions like the necessity of prayer; how to care for the terminally ill; making sense of brain-dead patients; how to give hope in hopeless situations; etc. Apart from dealing with the anguish and grief surrounding the terrible medical conditions and consequences, he learns about faith and the reasons for prayer. One precious insight is how he sees prayer as ceding control to God alone, instead of bending His way to conform with what we want. Not all answers to prayers must be yes. God must be free to say anything He wants to say. We cannot chain God up or hold him to some kind of ransom. He uses the example of a fellow surgeon who was so fixated on an inner tumour but failed to notice the bleeding happening on the outer skin. Likewise, we cannot be so focused on our own needs that we fail to see God's bigger picture. Even for patients with GBM, hopelessness need not have the final say. Faith extends further into the afterlife, into a dimension that present life cannot comprehend. Here, medical science know-how that focuses on getting better grapples with the reality of getting worse. Part Two is a tough personal section about the "difficult dark."  We read about the author's son, Mitchell's difficult last years. This is a major reason for the author to write this book: to help himself cope with loss. It is hoped that his story would help those who are also going through hard times like loss. From observing the grief of others, Warren ends up having to go through grief himself. This gives him multiple angles to look at death and dying. The title of this book comes from the moment when the author was looking himself in the mirror as he wrestles with faith and doubt. Part Three is essentially about seeing faith break through the barriers of pain and loss. Warren writes: "The best way to change your mind about difficult circumstances is somehow to find solid ground for your feet even when life sweeps the foundation from underneath you."

My Thoughts
Reading this book reminds me of Dr Paul Brand and Philip Yancey's book about pain, leprosy, and faith. What Brand and Yancey did for leprosy, Lee Warren does for GBM, or a form of terminal brain cancer. It is not an easy book to write, for it involves lots of personal struggle and pain. Doctors may have the medical knowledge and techniques to help patients. Yet, there are many things still beyond human control. Terminal illness is something that hits people from nowhere. When that happens, most do not know how to react or to feel. The author of this book has experienced both from the doctor's angle as well as a personal perspective. In a way, being able to write this book brings a lot of personal healing to Warren, especially after losing his son. While attempting to help patients and their families dealing with GBM situations, Warren has also helped readers understand the complexities not only of the disease but also the human emotions throughout.

I appreciate Warren's manner of writing this book. He helps us see the effects of GBM by describing what the disease, its devastating effects, and the ethical dilemmas that came with it. Looking at it from a faith angle, he does not provide easy answers. Neither does he try to come up with a theology to justify God. Instead, he shares with us his personal enigmas and struggles in an open and honest manner. This reminds me that in situations where there seems to be no physical hope, we can still turn to prayer. We are reminded that we are often not the masters of our own destinies. We can decide, but how our decisions will pan out in the future is beyond our control. If there is one Bible verse that aptly summarizes Warren's thoughts, it would be Mark 9:24, where the father of a child cried out: "Lord, I believe, help my unbelief." I think this book holds together faith, doubt, and hope tightly together in the hope that one day, all things and answers will be revealed.

Author Dr Lee Warren is a neurosurgeon, inventor, war veteran, and writer. He works at the Wyoming Medical Center.

Rating: 4.5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book has been provided courtesy of Waterbrook Press and NetGalley without requiring a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.